February 4th, 2023 ~
You would think that by now I would be used to these things happening to me, but I’m not. Just a couple of weeks ago on February 4th 2023, I attended a mass in remembrance of our beloved high school teacher Alicia Marill.
This rainy Saturday morning, I found myself in a packed church trying to pay my respects but instead I was quite actively judging myself. I went out dancing and drinking the night before and now I was feeling exhausted. Even worse than that, I could not get this bright red lipstick off. It was a dead giveaway.
I tried to let go of my inner chatter and focus on the eulogy. So many people came up to say beautiful things. The priest referred to her as “Santa Mujer” and then he said “She would really like that!” and the crowd laughed in acknowledgement. At that moment her essence, her soul, her energy appeared above the altar and started dancing!
I tried to ignore what I was seeing. I always tell myself no at first. I’m always reluctant to see what I see. I always tell myself “all these people here and you see her, but no one else does, sure, you must be sooooo special”. I looked down at the pew and I turned my attention back to the self judgement, “me and dancing, ugh, now I’m tired, how embarassing”. Denial, sarcasm, and skepticism with dash of dehydration and 24 hour lipstick. I felt like a spectacle.
When I looked back up, she was right in front of me. Ms. Marill patted me on my cheek and said, “Haces bien, la vida hay que disfrutarla” She said a lot more to me that day but those are the words that I remember. She urged me to continue with a pet project of mine that I had put on the back burner. It’s as if she showed me that it was energetically under the umbrella of her foundation Amor en Acción. She relit that fire.
Ms. Marill also gave me a message for her dear friend. She made me get up and move next to her and was trying to get me to channel during her mass. I did not. Later that day, I delivered her message and I have now forgotten what it was. I’ll take that as a sign that the message was received.